Stick Figure Warning Man returns this week with three all-new Deadly Follies. See our minimalist representational individual encounter a load lifter, boring machine, and mulcher with bitterness as his only weapon.

Since he recently completed his report on human mating habits, Zonar can now return to reviewing movies he has no intention of seeing.

Elsewhere, word on the street is that The City Desk will be gearing up for a month full of new content. Enjoy the merry merry month of May with all-new stories of an all-fake city.

Also, The Green Rapper, an old friend of the Cap’n, is rapping ’bout things that matter on his site. No, it’s not a jokey jokester page, it’s actually for-serious, but we still like it too. Check it out.

They’re complaining their complaints again over on The Complaint Dept.. Get ‘em while they’re hot.

New today on The Wacky Channel: When even the Magic Hobo’s powers aren’t enough to help Emily Jane get pretty for the big birthday party, the pair turn to another mystical being for help: Queen Glamazonia, the Magic… well, you’ll see in Emily Jane & The Magic Hobo, episode two: Shades of Red.

Three new letters of complaint this week in The Complaint Dept., three new confusing examples of annoyance. Enjoy.

And while you’re still recovering from celebrating from St. Patrick’s Day, why not visit Cap’n Wacky’s Boatload of Bunnies, featuring the Gallery of Unfortunate Easter Cards, the Extreme Easter Egg Hunt, and the shocking truth about the Easter Bunny.

 This week, those girl-geniuses, Kitty and Evelyn Knox, return to solve another thrilling mystery on The Wacky Channel in The Knox Sisters Mysteries - episode two: Cry, Uncle! The sibling sleuths are faced with another puzzling dilemma right in their own living room, and this time - it’s MURDER! Can our gumshoes in argyle get to the bottom of this one? See for yourself!

Don’t worry if you missed out on the first episode, you can still catch the debutant detectives’ debut in The Knox Sisters Mysteries - episode one: The Unexpected Crust on the Wacky Channel too. 

 And get in the St. Patrick’s Day spirit by visiting our very greenest section (along with all-new Cap’n logo), Cap’n Wacky’s Boatload of Blarney with lots of Irish fun, including The Gallery of Unfortunate St. Patrick’s Day Cards, The Leprechaun Hall of Shame, and Cap’n Wacky’s Traditional Irish Blessing.On St. Patrick’s Day, everyone’s a little bit Irish. And when reading our site, we think everyone’s a little bit Cap’n. Wait, that didn’t work right.

How about this: On St. Patrick’s Day, everyone’s a little bit drunk and that makes our jokes funnier.Eh, we’ll work on it for next year.