FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Second Anniversary Gala

Alien advice columnist Zonar the Superion is seen here with his date, a clone of actress Angela Lansbury. Zonar explained that he made the clone from strands of hair he stole from Lansbury's dressing room that he broke into earlier this year during taping of the TV movie "Murder, She Wrote: The Last Man Free." By the end of the evening, the clone had dissolved into its component elements. "Unfortunately, this was before I could have my own private screening of 'Bedknobs and Broomsticks,' if you know what I mean," said Zonar, adding, "If I had eyelids I'd be winking now."
Amalgamated Humor