August 16, 2002
Dear Loyal Readers,
Wow, three years can sure go fast, can't they? I imagine it seems like just yesterday to all of you too, that Cap'n Wacky's Boatload of Fun wasn't part of your life. Well, you're wrong. It wasn't just yesterday, though, it was three whole years ago. It was way back in 1999.
We had no idea what we were getting ourselves into of course, we just thought we'd set up our little comedy website to help distract everyone for a bit from the inevitability of the world ending in a horrible rain of hellfire at the turn of the millennium. I mean, honestly, how many of us thought we'd still be alive come January of 2000? Not me, that's for damn sure!
Well, unfortunately, the rapture didn't come as expected, and so RJ White and I have been stuck with this Cap'n Wacky thing ever since. Somehow we took our half-dozen little ideas and have managed to keep going, with updates of fresh comedy damn near every week, ever since.
Week in. Week out.
Which seriously begins to mess with your head. I no longer experience life as a series of events happening to me so much as a stream of potential material for the Cap'n. If something awkward or embarrassing happens at work, normal people try to forget about it. I wonder if it's right to turn into a Guy Who Looks Like a Fish comic. Normal people see a construction site and either complain about urban sprawl or feel good about the promise of tomorrow. I start scanning the equipment for new Stick Figure Warning Man signs. Valentines Day isn't about romance to me; it's about worrying that The Gallery of Unfortunate Valentines is going to get too much traffic and crash our server again. A goddamn vacation in Vegas turned into a Cap'n Wacky feature! I can't even take a proper vacation anymore!
It's all worth it, though, when one of our readers writes in to let us know how much Cap'n Wacky has brightened their day. Of course, this never happens though, because you selfish S.O.B.s just take, take, take! Look what you've done to me!
Photo of Brodie in 1999:
Current photo of Brodie:
I don't blame you (much), though. I blame those creeps who promised us an apocalypse come January 1, 2000, or failing that, at least a complete meltdown our complex web of interlocking computers.
Damn you. I was promised chaos and Armageddon and all I got was this little wooden sailor around my neck.