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STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS
I keep hearing people describe this as the first animated Star Wars movie, but really who can tell the difference?

Please note that I do not mean that as a compliment about the level of realism in the animation.

What I mean is the last three movies were 90% cartoons anyway.

Of course, there is a strong possibility that some of the human characters will seem MORE lifelike in this version.

THE MUMMY: TOMB OF THE DRAGON EMPEROR
Alternate title: Brendan Fraser Cashes A Paycheck: Episode 13.

Yes, I did make that same basic joke last month, but I think he made the same MOVIE last month, so who is really to blame?

THE ROCKER
Office-fans, are you excited to watch this big-screen star turn by Rainn ("Dwight") Wilson? I'm sure it won't disappoint, at least not any more than Steve Carrel going after Jim Carrey's sloppy seconds in "Evan Almighty" or John Krasinski as Robin Williams backboard in "License to Wed."

SPACE CHIMPS/FLY ME TO THE MOON
OK, Earthlings. Keep your burping, farting, catch-phrase spouting bargain basement CGI talking pests OUT of space. Speaking on behalf of the space-faring creatures of the universe, we do NOT want them. You will only hasten your inevitable conquest and/or destruction if you persist in sending them.

You have been warned.

THE SISTERHOOD OF THE TRAVELING PANTS 2
If they keep traveling, those pants are going to wind up in space too. I just know it.


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