Just how stupid does someone have to be to get hit by the arm of a parking garage gate? Let me count the ways:

1. These arms don't stay up long. If you're able to stand under it, odds are very good you just saw the damn thing go up. So, even if somehow you've never seen one of these before, you know how they move. What goes up, must come down - even if your idiotic melon head is under it.

2. You're hanging around right in path of oncoming traffic. Frankly, a little bump on the noggin isn't even the greatest danger to you.

3. You enjoy just standing there in parking garages.

©2002, Amalgamated Humor, Inc.