By DUNCAN PFLASTER, BEN FLASTER, BRODIE H. BROCKIE and RJ WHITE
WESLEY FARNUM-BRITE: All the television programs that he truly enjoyed never lasted more than a mere THREE SERIES!
RODERICK WINFIELD: Just two years after the expedition, had the song "Jingle Bells" stuck in his head for two solid weeks... IN JUNE!
MICHAEL LESLEY CARLISLE: Everytime he told someone about the expedition they would make essentially THE SAME lame mummy/mommy joke.
WILLIAM FARNSWORTH, ESQ.: Whenever he tried to engage an attractive female in conversation, was only able to discuss his recent bowel movements and their implications of his general condition of health
J.G. CODINHEIM: Could no longer appreciate the difference between a single-malt and blended whisky. And if you know J.G. Codgingheim, you know how much a curse that is.
FINIUS WROCK: Overcome with an unhealthy obsession to obtain pictures of former President William Taft in womens' lingerie.
JOANNA SMYTHE: Had a terrible non-stop craving for "Mummyberry Crunch", a cereal that doesn't even EXIST!
EGBERT BURK-TARKINGTON: Suddenly became heterosexual overnight.
MAURICIAU ZACHARIAH BENKENSINGSON-LASTERSTONHINEY: Name became long and unweildy.
SIR NORRIS JERRELL WHITEHEAD: Was plagued for the rest of his life with prank calls asking for "Sir Blackhead", who then claimed they had the wrong "zit code".
JONATHAN WICKSWORTH-HOPINGTON: Without it being brought up, constantly felt pedantic need to point out to people that it was the tomb which was cursed, not the mummy.
JOHNSON, LORD HORKINGTON: Sprained his index finger.
SIR GEOFFREY CLYDESWORTHY, BART: Under the assumed nom de musique "Reggie and the Hats-Off Club", recorded the song "Mummy Shuffle", which topped the UK Billboard charts for 10 weeks in 1963, but then inspiration dried up and the "band" became a notorious one-hit wonder.
AMOUN ABISI: Had to put up with many more stupid white tourists from England.