By CALAMITY JON "APE-LAW" MORRIS, BRODIE "THE 8TH WONDER OF THE WORLD" BROCKIE, BEN "BANANA PEEL" FLASTER, SEAN "OOO OOO OOO" OSMAN, "GIBBON" GUTBLOOM, and DUCAN "MONKEY'S UNCLE" PFLASTER

The King Gong

King Pong

Non-stick King Tongs

The King Bong

PING PONG BALLS!?!?

Burger King King Kong Burger: 7 flame-grilled beef patties, 37 slices of cheese, special bar-b-kong sauce, and a pickle.

King Kong N'air extra strength

King Kong Trojans

Peter Jackson's All Monkey Meat Diet Book

King Kong Action Figure with Poo-Flinging Action

King Kotex "Giant" Maxipads

A season of Survivor: Skull Island

A live action version of the Ghostbusters cartoon based on the 70s TV show, featuring King Kong

Peter Jackson's Let-The-Animals-Run-Wild day at the Detroit Zoo

Kong Jerkey

Ben & Jerry's Monkey Chunks Ice Cream

The King Dong - Upon further review, this has been reconsidered and approved by marketing.