PUT IT IN THE GROUND WHERE THE FLOWERS GROW

Ready to be more awesome? We have another new helpful HOW TO essay entitled “HOW TO quit smoking.” It’s about quitting smoking and how to do it. Clarity in nomenclature. Check it out, along with the rest of our HOW TO articles here!

ALSO: the Fourth of July is coming up! Make your friends’ Independence Day independently hilarious by telling them to Cap’n Wacky’s Boatload of Patriotic Enthusiasm!

ALSO: You did something different with your hair, didn’t you? No? Well, something looks just great today. Whatever you’re doing, keep it up!