The Cap'n's Log

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This week, a new list: Things To Do in the Last Moments of Your Life After You've Noticed Your Parachute Didn't Open.

And speaking of last moments of life, let me break the veil of anonymity for a moment to talk about someone. This is Brodie writing the Cap'n's Log this week. I was a huge fan of The Muppet Show as a boy, and the comedy featured on it was likely an enormous influence on my developing sense of humor. I recently bought the first season on DVD and am relieved and delighted to find that the show is even better than I remember it.

Though I didn't know his name as a kid, Jerry Juhl (as head-writer for most of the show's run) had a lot to do with that. Juhl also wrote for Fraggle Rock, Sesame Street, the various Muppet movies - pretty much if there's a Muppet in something you're watching and it's funny, he had some hand in it. Jim Henson and Frank Oz are household names today in large part because Jerry Juhl wrote material for them that was worthy of their talents.

Jerry Juhl died on Monday from complications due to cancer. May he rest in peace, if that's what he wants. Most likely, though, he'd like an afterlife with a little more action and occasional chaos.

Jerry Juhl and Kermit the Frog

Thanks, Jerry.

True patriots love in all our sons command

After we inadvertantly came up with a theme last week, we thought we'd try again this time. To begin with, our list this week is Ways to Boost Canadian Tourism.

Once you've digested that, follow it up with Zonar's Reviews of Movies I Have No Intention of Seeing because probably someone who worked on one of those movies was Canadian, I bet.

It was merely acting! Genius!

We cobbled ourselves together a little theme here this week! What is it? Well, guess for yourself- First, a new list: Forgotten Broadway Shows

Secondly: A few words before the show

Pencils down.

Figure out the theme yet? That's right. It's Shoe Repair.

Dance, monkey, dance!

Man, skip the fresh comedy ONE WEEK and you crybabies can't stop crybabying about being a bunch of crybabies, can you? You crybabies.

You want the comedy? Is that all we are to you? FINE! Take it:

This week's list, What We're Not Calling Our Hot Dog Stand

AND

This Month's Disgruntled Employee of the Month

THERE! Happy now?

But when is it my turn to cry?

I'll have another latte, miss

Hello. This is Amalgamated Humor Co-President Mr. Brockie typing at you fine folks out there in Internet-land today. Am I coming through all clear? I'm afraid there is no fresh comedy update for you today. Our usual webmaster is off for Labor Day weekend early and I volunteered to update the site in his absence. Well, wouldn't you know it, our cable internet connection went down last night and our tech support person is also our webmaster in what seemed like a good idea at the time, but now not so much.

Anyway, I tried to switch to dial-up, but I'm not sure how that works. Do I dial the internet's phone number in the computer's number pad? Do I dial the internet on the telephone and then just put the receiver by my computer's speaker? I don't get it.

So now I'm at an internet cafe and that's how I'm typing this on the internet to you now, but I'm afraid I left all of this week's comedy back at the office. Yoops. Oh well, at least they have some tasty lemon poppy seed muffins.

Man, you sure can find anything on the internet, can't you? I just tried to see if there were any pictures of kitties on the internet, and you know how many there are? LOTS. Even this one:

CUTE! If you'd like this picture on a shirt (or any one of several other fashionable kitty or horsey designs, head to this site! 2 CUTE!! :)