Oh, man. I'm going to be late for work! I can't find my keys anywhere! I always hang them up right by the door, and they're not there!
Are they over here? In this month's Disgruntled Employee of the Month? Nope. I don't see them anywhere in there.
Wait, I had some groceries with me when I came home last night. Maybe I left them on the kitchen counter! NO! They're not there! Man, I'm going to get fired for this I just know it.
WAIT! What about the newest Flotsam and Jetsam feature, The State of the Anthill! Did I leave my keys in there? Nope, that's too full of hilarious comedy to fit in any keys.
Waitaminunte! I remember now! I was depressed last night about squandering my youth and exuberance and got really, really drunk and then started to think my car was full of mummies who wanted to eat me and that if I ate my keys I would somehow be safe from the mummies for reasons that are no longer clear to me. I guess it's true what they say: they're always in the last place you look. Silly me.
Posted by capnslog at April 2, 2004 12:31 AM